Four years on and I was a Divemaster, a year later and Richard convinced me that I should do the Assistant Instructor Course - don't listen to this man, he will keep you poor. By this stage I was hooked on teaching - I loved it, but it took me another three years before I decided to take the plunge and do the full Instuctor course.

The Instructor Course is split into two parts - the course and the exam. The course can be an IDC (Instructor Development Course) or an OWSI (Open Water Scuba Instructor). If you are a Divemaster you do the IDC which covers the stuff you would learn on the Assistant Instructor course and gets you up to Instructor level. The OSWI is for AIs and is shorter than the IDC because you already learnt some of it on the AI course. As an AI, I did the OWSI.

The OWSI covers classroom work, which includes mock exams, delivering presentations to the class just like you would on a course and studying the the course manuals from Open Water upwards and the Instructor manual. There is also a pool session where you need to demonstrate all the skills learnt on an Open Water Course - these skills need to be to 'demonstration' quality - you don't just do the skill you have to perform it so that somebody watching you can see easily how to perform the skill. Lastly there is an open water session where you are given typical student problems to overcome.

Once you have completed the course (4 days for the OWSI) the Course Director running it decides if you are good enough to attend the Instructor Exam (IE). If so, you get a form to take with you to the exam which is run directly by PADI.

Then the IE - This is where it starts for real. I didn't sleep for more than an hour the night before the exam and I can vouch for the fact that the IE is the most powerful laxative know to man ! I have never been so nervous about anything in my whole life and most of the others on the course were the same. Up until this point the IE was a mystery, I'd heard whispers - "It's really tough", "make one mistake and you'll fail the whole course", " the examiners are hard as nails", but I needed facts. This feature gives anyone thinking of doing the Instructor Course the facts.

Fact 1.
It's only tough if you don't know the answers - If you prepare well, the exams are no harder than the DM or AI course. People kept telling me this and I didn't believe them, but it's true.

Fact 2.
You can mess up and still not fail (but not too much). You are allowed to fail one of the six exams and take a re-sit so long as it isn't the Standards & Proceedures exam - this is fifty questions open book i.e. you can look up the answers, but you only get 90 minutes. The other 5 exams are closed book - you need to know the answers in your head. Pass mark for all of the exams is 75% same as every other PADI exam you have ever done. If you fail two it's game over - you also have to pay for the IE again (£346) - ouch !

Fact 3.
The pool evaluation should present no problems to anybody taught by CDWC. The stuff we do in the pool is exactly how PADI want to see it done. If you are an AI or DM then watch the Instructors in the pool and practice demonstrating skills to students. You have to demonstrate five skills. You also have to give a presentation of a skill including briefing and debriefing and assessment of problems. The score for each of these is out five - you need more than three and a half to pass.

DAY ONE.
Beep, beep, beep. The alarm cuts through to wake me from my slumber. The time? 3 o’clock in the morning…….Blimey! Still, after a quick bit of shower and shine and a plate of fruit and fibre I was feeling good. The lurve cruiser was fired up, last minute loading completed and I was on my way to the boss man’s gaff. After a bit more loading of luggage, kids and grownup’s we were away to Gatwick airport. Car parking, (plus trying to figure out how the shuttle bus worked!!!), meeting up with the rest of the team and check in, (in which I got my feet checked for some reason, weird), took up our time after which I managed to fit in another breakfast, (a fry up at that!). We’d just managed to sink it when the call to board came across and we were away to the departure lounge. The shocking picture in my passport got me on to the plane, (I was wearing a thong in that photo you know!!!!), and we were seated, belted and ready to go. The plane ride was smooth, the view over land and sea was great and in no time at all we were there. First thing to hit me, (apart from my hand luggage when I pulled from the overhead locker!), was the heat. It was HOT. We breezed through arrivals and pilled onto the waiting taxis which whisked us away to our final destination in the form of The Pergola Club Hotel. I don’t mind at this point saying that I was starting to feel the strain of the trip catching up with me but a little time spent unpacking in the air conditioned room of the hotel made me feel better. Next, transport collection in the form of three minibuses from the local rental company was sorted, (I had the best one!), and then it was time for me to get lost big time in the hotel but I did enjoy the rides in the lifts though. I opted to spend the first night in the company of some of the guys at the hotel buffet which were local dishes and very nice indeed after which it was crash out time. It had been a long day.

The sun was hotting up as we arrived at a little bay just across from the ferry terminal at Cirkewwa so after a briefing about the dive and local nasties to be found in the water, it was all go! I thought I was stepping into the bath at home, the water was so warm and as I went under I could see for meters in all directions. We finned off in one big group dropping down to around 30 meters, checking that we were weighted properly, going round the headland, under swim through’s and over beds of white sand with scattered rocks.

One thing that caught my attention was the lack of fish life but that didn’t bother me much, I was just blown away by it all. Back at the hotel, it was time for some nourishment and a quick change around of my minibus, (Yes, an even better one!) and we were off again. Our destination? The wreck of the warship “HMS Maori” in a little place called Elmo Bay, (I think that’s what it says in me log). Visibility this time was not as good as before but the wreck looked good in around 10 to 13 meters of water and there was more fish life to be seen which was good for me as I had the old picture snapper out for a bit of flash gun sniping, oh yes!

DAY FOUR.
Oh heck! An early start today, and I thought I’d left then all behind in England. No matter, it was well worth it as this was going to be my favourite day of the holiday, (not that they all weren’t!). The fruit and yoghurt was beginning to grow on my so after a big bowl full and the usual routine of gear and people loading, we were off to the small ferry terminal at Cirkewwa for the short boat ride to Gozo, the second largest of the islands in the chain of three. We joined the queue of waiting cars, having a quick chit chat with some of the locals as we waited for the other minibus with our cylinders to join us. The horn of the ferry signalled it’s arrival so with tickets at the ready, we boarded and made our way up onto the decks. Half an hour or so and a smooth crossing later, we were docked and unloaded on the island of Gozo. I think we must have arrived at about rush hour time because most of the main towns were alive with traffic and people going about there daily routines. We reached our destination, the appropriately named Blue Hole, in no time at all and after the usual look about and dive briefing we were geared up and heading off on the short(ish) walk to the entry point, (Damm those rocks were sharp!). I felt a bit like a two legged mountain goat as I made my way to the entry point, a medium sized pool of water separated from the sea by a barrier of rock. The fins were on, the BCD inflated, the reg in and camera secured as I rolled into the warm clear water and waited for the others. As I bobbed around waiting I decided to just take a sneaky look underwater and saw that the rock barrier went down to about five metres after which was an opening which extended to the seabed at about twenty metres. “Hmmm, looking good”, I thought. The others were soon sorted and we began our descent, myself making up the rear so I could snap unhindered with the camera. The rest of the group was already making it’s way through the opening into open water as I touched down onto the twenty metre point at which I stopped to take in the view. In front of me lay metres and metres of clear blue water with the rocky seabed slopping down into an abyss of depth. As I looked forward, I could see the group moving along the side of the rock face, from the furthest person to the nearest one. It was unreal and totally blew my mind! But, as they say, the show must go on so I got myself together, readied the camera and off I went, snapping furiously. Thirty or so minutes later we were back at the opening, ascending back up the hole to five metres for our safety stop and exit. I didn’t care about the walk back over the sharp rocks to the parking area, I was still high on my fix of diving the Blue Hole! We made use of the local eating establishment at the parking area after which it was time for dive two. This was just a short walk away to a site called The Inland Sea. We made our way on the surface from a small beach area, (being careful about the local boat traffic), to a narrow archway where we made our decent to a pebble/sandy seabed. The entrance was scattered with a few large boulders and then it was back to the pebbles again with the swim through being around ten metres wide. The view at the other end was as before, metres and metres of clear blue water. Wow! One thing I did notice this time was more fish which made for a better dive. On the way back, the view of boats whizzing along the surface, propellers spinning wildly, was an interesting sight to watch, just as long as we were well below them! Another thing whizzing around was us as we dekitted, loaded and hit the road to catch the ferry back. We made it, (just!) and were back at the hotel in no time. I decided on some late evening cooking on a sun lounger and a dip in the pool to finish off with. Great! We ended the day at one of the local restaurants in the town and then it was back to the hotel for cocktails and twisting by the pool, oh yes!

DAY SIX.
“Don’t forget to bring some bread from breakfast with you today”. That was the message which whizzed round my head as I sat munching my bowl full of fruit and yoghurt. Today’s destination? The small island of Comino, in between Malta and Gozo. The bread? Well, more on that later. The usual load up of people and gear took place and then we were off to the dive centre to pick up the boat for the short trip to the island. With gear, cylinders and bodies aboard, we shoved off in what seemed to be the converted local fishing smack and busied our self’s with gear prep and taking in the view. The splash of the anchor going over the side signalled our arrival at a small bay type area so briefed up, breaded up and geared up, I hit the drink and waited for the others to make their entry. As we went under, hundreds of fish swarmed around us, obviously knowing what was going to happen as we landed on a seabed of white sand dotted with the occasional rock. We fanned out into a semicircle and one by one the bread was brought out. The fish went absolutely mental!!! I didn’t get a chance to open my bag, they went through the bag, took chunks out of the bread and then chunks out of my hand!!! What a sight!!! After the frenzy had died down we moved off and explored a couple of the caves and had a good nose around the whole area, ending up back at the boat. A quick bottle of coke and a fresh cylinder later saw me set for dive two after which, with a few minutes to kill, it was snorkelling time so over the side I went! The anchor was pulled and engines fired up and we set off for the short jump to a place called Alex’s Cave. This time there was not so many fish going mad but the cave was huge, so big we all managed to get in it! On the way back I noticed so of the others lying on the sand looking under a rock so being the nosy type, I dropped down to see what was going on. There in the torch light was an octopus, tying to get a bit of shut eye and not very pleased to see us, (octopus turn a red colour if their hacked off and I don’t think this one was embarrassed!). Back on the boat it was kit squared away, change out of wetsuit and a bit of a lounge around as the boat chucked back to the jetty where after load up of vans and drop off of cylinders, it was back to the hotel for the usual. We once again took over one of the local restaurants where I thought it would be good to try a bit of pasta for a change. All I can say is yummmm….. it was damm good! Cocktails, a bit of MTV, crashout, need I say more???

DAY SEVEN.
Well, this is it, our last day of diving, but what a dive it was going to be! After the usual, ie breakie, load up, drive off, it was back to the dive centre and another ride out on the local fishing smack. The dive today was going to be the most challenging of the holiday. We were heading for the wreck of the Imperial Eagle, a two hundred and fifty tonne car ferry in about forty odd metres of water off a place called Qawra point. As it was so deep, there would only be the one dive today so with a fresh roll of film in the camera and a big fifteen litre cylinder strapped to the jacket, I was ready to get it on! We reached the site and tied off on the shot line and after briefing and kit up, in we went. As I made my way down the shot line, I could see the anchor point on the sea bed some twenty plus metres below me and just off to the right of the shot, two of the guys making their way to the wreck. I dropped off the line at around twenty metres and began finning in the direction of the wreck, the water turning noticeably cooler as I approached the clean white sand seabed. In the distance I could make out a huge shape and then I was there, the bow of the ship with anchors still in place, brill! I fired a couple of shots off with the camera and then made my way to the stern at deck level, dropping to the sea bed and the starboard propeller for a few more photos. At forty plus metres, no-stop time was going fast so moving up to deck level, I finned slowly towards the bow. On my way there I could see bubbles coming up through the deck planks from other divers who were inside the wreck. I stopped at the remains of the wheelhouse for a couple more shots, one of which was what was left of the ships wheel sitting in front of the mast, a fantastic sight. I moved forward taking in the winches for the anchors and the bow section at which point the computer began to beep, I was in decompression. I secured the camera and made my way back to the shot line, stopping on route to view the huge statue of Christ which stood as if to look over the wreck and the people on it. A quick look at the computers when I returned to the shot and a bit of number crunching said that time to surface was going to be about nine minutes with enough air for over half an hour, so no worries there. A nice and easy accent was called for and at eighteen metres, I stopped as I saw the others on the line. As they made their way to the surface I moved up again, the computer counting down the minutes. At ten metres I saw the others leaving the water and climbing the boat ladder out but not for me, I was still showing five minutes of accent time left. I only wished I’d brought something to read on the way up! Six metres, and the computer showed just the three minute safety stop which seemed to take forever at five metres. I wondered what would happen if I fell asleep with a reg in my mouth but I needn’t have worried, the computer cleared and I was on the surface and on the boat, well pleased with the way things had gone. A quick coke, a quick change and a quick packup kept me busy as the boat headed back to the dive centre jetty. It was all hands to the pumps when we got back as hired gear was handed in, paperwork picked up, gear rinsed off and loaded and payments sorted. I started on a bit of packing at the hotel, mainly the camera and dive gear after which, yes you’ve guessed it, pool time! (again). The guys from the dive centre were there as well, doing try dives in the pool so me and a few others hung about, asking highly technical questions just to keep them on their toes. Our last major night out was followed by…… well you know how it goes by now.

DAY EIGHT & NINE.
Well people, this is it. Our last day on the island was to be used for our own fun and mischief. We still had one of the minibuses at our disposal so after a bit of a lay in and my last bowl of fruit and yoghurt, me and some of the guys headed for the beach just down from the dive centre for the ultimate thrill……Wetbikes! Oh yes, several hundred cc’s of power minus the wheels and the hard landings on tarmac! With buoyancy aids secured, a quick run through on how everything worked and a few safety rules, I took the controls as my charming passenger jumped on the back. We took it steady through the safety area after which, checking that everything was OK, I hit the gas…..and floored it!!!! My word, I thought someone had lit the blue touchpaper, it was lift off! Twenty minutes of tearing through the water, (and the air at one point!), and it was all over. We cruised back to the beach and, with big smiles all round, watched as the others went out for their burnup. What a laugh! A few hours back at the hotel for some nosh, a bit of chit chat with the rest of the guys, (and to get over the bikes!), and we were off again, this time to an old airfield where the huts and buildings had been converted to art and craft factories and shops. There was everything, from glass and jewellery to textiles and pottery. I couldn’t resist buying a little something for myself, so I did! We moved on to the Silent City afterwards, an old Roman walled city now a tourist attraction. What a place, didn’t think much of the stocks though! Time was soon upon us, so we boarded and were back to the hotel. I dropped the bus back to the hire company and took the chance to do a bit of window shopping on the way back. Only a few hours left so with packing sorted it was time for a meal to set me up for the journey back. The transport to the airport arrived so after we said are goodbyes to the hotel staff, we were on our way. It was dark as we got to the airport and after check in and baggage check, I settled down for the wait to board, made a bit longer by an hour’s delay. But as they say, time flies when your having fun and we were soon seated, belted and airborne. The lights of Gatwick came into view the following day and after around two and a half hours in the air it was touchdown. With customs, baggage reclaim and vehicles found and loaded, we were gone on our separate ways. The sun was just coming up as I dropped the guys young and old back to the bossman’s gaff after which, at just before six in the morning, I was home for a few hours of well needed kip. I couldn’t have wanted more from a brilliant holiday.

So their you are people, a brilliant weeks holiday with hot weather and fab diving. Thanks goes to all the people at The Pergola Club Hotel for putting us up and putting up with us, (hope the plumbing’s sorted out soon!), all the team at Aquaventures Diving Centre and the guys who ran the boat out for us, Drifter vehicle rental for the minibuses, and the local restaurants for letting us take them over most nights! Last but not least, big, big thanks to our dive guide, Jason, who’s knowledge of the areas and organising of the dives made the trip what it was. Cheers mate.
OK then. As the saying goes, stick a fork in me I’m done! I hope those of you that went had as good a time as me self did. They’ll be more soon people so watch this space…….
Later folks.
The Fireman.